she was amazing. i already had two young boys, but i didn't care for them much. this, this was perfect. she was so small and beautiful. it didn't hurt at all and only took like 5 minutes. i delivered her myself. i was worried i left the cord too long. no words could describe how much peace and happiness i felt when i looked at her and held her. she was so small, and pink, and she never made a sound.
i couldn't decide what to name her. the whole time i was thinking. the best i could come up with was "helen" or "alice". but even then, i wasn't quite satisfied. no name could be as pretty as she was.
the father was my ex, dan. i called him up to let him know, even though i didn't want him to be in the child's life. he had his own life going on. i went up to show him the baby, and clayton took two pictures of my crinkly foot and one of me with the baby and posted them on locals. i looked really happy in the one with the baby.
then i was playing a show with mike o and j-vo in the cb highlands. after we were done i told them i'd given birth earlier that day, and i couldn't wait to get home to see my baby. they were pretty impressed. i think mike announced it over the P.A.
then i had to decide which way to go home. there were two routes, one on a regular highway, the other went through these crazy spiky mountains that were packed super tight. it was a windy trail with wooden ladders. i started walking that way while on the phone with my dad, i told him the ladder i was on ha some snow on it and he told me to come home the other way. i agreed.
